Yesterday was boxing day and Sonny and I spent it at his house, as his parents were very brave and hit the sales!
His parents came back home with a MacDonalds and a fruit shoot for him, and we were just sitting on the sofa, and randomly he leant over and put the fruit shoot in my mouth to drink. I know it doesn’t sound ground breaking or anything, but it shows he can help others, without any personal gain. Sharing can be difficult for any child, so for him to share his drink (and he LOVES fruit shoots) was fan-bloody-tastic.
And also the other day Sonny and I were on the way home from somewhere, and he did something else that showed me he could express love and kindness for another. He often covers his ears up with his hands as he is quite sensitive to noise (this is quite common in children with autism) and we were waiting for a tube. As the tube came into the platform, he got my hands with his and put them over my ears and said ‘eaassh’ So in a small way he was trying to look after me by telling me to cover my ears when the tube came past. Sonny was showing empathy and love, but not for any personal gain, not in return for anything, but just because.
He does understand the whole ‘You scratch my back I scratch yours’ concept. He often will swap you a toy in order to get the one he wants from you, or he will kiss me when he wants something, but these two random acts of kindness were different. They were totally unprompted and had no personal gain for him and that is massive progress for Sonny. I understand that sharing his drink and covering my ears doesn’t sound like a big deal to some, but it made me SO HAPPY to see him care for someone else (future husband, take note.)
So basically what I am trying to say is that the most important thing is the relationship and bond we have with a child. Taking him out to lots of different places is great for his education and speech development etc, but by showing him unconditional love he has started to show compassion and selflessness for other people, which can sometimes be difficult even for us non autistic adult folk.
In the spirit of love, here is a video of me singing to Sonny, (you may want to turn the volume down for this one.)
My favourite Christmas present this year was my new t-shirt from Sonny’s parents, they bought it for me so I could wear it when I run the marathon for the National Autistic Society. Click here to see my JustGiving page!